Emotional Availability

Friday, April 8, 2016 • 12:07 AM • 0 comments

In the dating process I've learned a lot about myself and what I truly value when it comes to love and romance.

Emotional Availability.

That to me is so important and what I truly value in a relationship.

I don't care if you can buy me nice expensive things. I don't care if you make thousands upon millions of bucks. I don't care if you drive a nice fancy car. I don't care if you have the handsomest face and the perfect body. I don't care. Sure I mean there is nothing wrong with all of this and it would no doubt be wonderful to have it all.

But all of that does not matter and is rendered meaningless & useless

..if you do not care about my feelings

..if you do not want to deal with me when I am upset

..if you resort to ignoring or avoiding conflict when clearly there are things that need to be addressed

..if you are not there for me when I am going through a hard time

..if you cannot open up, be vulnerable and show me your truest emotions

..if you do not let me into your world

..if you are unable to give me the emotional support that I occasionally need.

..if you disregard my emotional needs in general.

BASICALLY..

..if you are emotionally unavailable.

Because at the end of the day the truest genuine human connection lies in THE HEART. It lies in courageous openness and vulnerability. You cannot keep the flame alive or maintain a deep human bond if you keep on detaching, running away or building walls and fortresses around your heart. It is simply not possible. It only causes the bond to erode. and slip away. How do you expect to grow in love when you don't let each other in? When you're not vested 100%? When you're only halfway there?

He can buy you anything you want, support your lavish lifestyle or have the best looks, but if he doesn't care about your heart and what you feel and isn't there for you when you need him emotionally THEN WHAT IS THE POINT? It is going to hurt and make you feel miserable.

Last night I have been blessed to experience such wonderful love from my significant other. I opened up about some of my struggles and he was just completely there for me, 100%. He was fully present emotionally. In the course of our relationship I think it goes into the Top 5 moments I feel the most loved. He held me in his arms while I teared up and uplifted me with very kind, assuring and uplifting words of affirmation.

I'm so happy.

And hence the birth of this post.

So yes. Because of this I now really believe that for me, emotional availability is the most important factor to look for in a partner. With emotional availability everything else jives and flows. It creates a healthy climate for trust to be built. Without it trust is hard to build.
Emotional availability... means you are available to deal with hard difficult things. It means you are available to give and find the balance between give and take.

It simply means you are available to love authentically.

-Anthea ❤