Forever learning about life
Tuesday, November 6, 2012 • 9:21 PM • 0 comments
Was going through my old notebook and found this thing I wrote on my 22nd birthday (which was in May btw)
[Author's note: I have edited some parts so it isn't exactly like what I wrote in my notebook hahaha but main points are the same]:
♠♠♠♠
Things i've learned & observed after 2 decades+ of living:
1.1. As much as you believe that things won't change (especially things like your values, beliefs, needs or even your preference of color...food... or boys) THEY WILL CHANGE. But we don't really realize it...
1.2. People who know you from 5 years ago may not be accustomed to the 5-years-later version of you. Then you start to question things like "What, you mean you expect me to be the exact same person I was 5 years ago? Yes I get high & tipsy & get really rowdy, so what? Is that so wrong? I'm sorry, WAS THERE A MEMO THAT seemingly 'young, naive & innocent' looking girls who go to church a lot do not go out & get drunk? Even if there was such memo, that memo is bullshit"
That's okay. That's their problem not yours.
1.3. There are times when you think you already know everything about yourself.
Like how you swear you will always get the Java Chip or Green Tea frap at Starbucks and never order anything else. and swear you will not like that Salted Caramel Mocha frap (which just sounds totally bizarre, I mean.. salted caramel? who puts salt in caramel? or caramel in salt?).
but we are beings of constant change..self-discovery is ongoing all throughout the days of your life.
you took a chance and turns out you have a newfound love for Salted Caramel Mocha.
1.4 There are also times when you think you don't know yourself anymore and you would be completely freaked out by it. but in light of my previous point "we are beings of constant change", it's okay and it's normal.
You need to allow your identity to evolve.
Yes, you swore that you will NEVER smoke a cigarette EVER in your LIFE but you were "young & reckless" and took an experimental puff that night (okay, maybe half a box but you didn't deeply inhale it) and you felt like you lost a part of yourself and broke your own vow of never smoking a cigarette. It's fine, don't be so melodramatic. It's not like you got hooked anyway.
Like I said. Allow your identity to evolve. and don't freak out once you've actually allowed it.
2. There will always be something we learn the hard way. Don't beat yourself up and blame yourself for getting into shitty situations. Adversity is necessary for growth. Unless the shitty situation repeats itself over & over again despite having the will to change it, then... maybe you should reconsider beating yourself up & go do something about it haha.
3. Coffee is awesome. How can you not live without coffee! POWER TO CAFFEINE.
What I want to be in the future:
1. To be a person who honors God's calling..
and honor who I truly am,
and not conform to the worldly and materialistic notions of society.
2. To be a strong, independent woman...
Note: This is going to be hard but try anyway
♠♠♠♠
That's it, I wish I wrote more. I guess I'll check back in a year or two and see if i've progressed or not or whether I still believe in this. Hahaha.
Till my next post, toodles!
-Anthea ❤
