Just let it go
Saturday, July 14, 2012 • 3:04 AM • 0 comments
"When one thing you believed in shatters to the ground, all the broken pieces that is
where you will be found.
Everything you know, let go..all the memories that you hold, let go..
Everything you know, let go..all the memories that you hold, let go..
healing can be found when you let go"
♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬
Today I woke up with an immense feeling of dread. And as the day went by the feeling of dread continued. Had so much going through my mind, mainly the current situation my life sits in...
As I took my shower today I fervently called out to God silently in my heart, in utmost desperation with tears streaming down...
I'm not miserable just because the holiday is ending soon & I have to leave kk again. Although that is part of it, it's so much more than that. It derives from underlying issues that are much deeper and complex...
and I am mad. mad at everything. mad at the world. mad at my life. mad at myself. why do things have to be this way...
This is the sky during the sunset just now. It was so mind-blowingly and spell-bindingly STUNNING. Picture does not do justice... but it was seriously one of the most beautiful, most exotic and rare blend of colors i've ever seen in a sunset.
And it is the kind of sunset that I would paint if you ask me to paint a sunset. My sunsets always have pink and lavender/purple in it :)
As I internalized the amazing view from my bedroom window I felt that my heart was being comforted by God. Assurance.. peace.. comfort.. love...
I always believe that you can make a tangible connection with God through nature.
and I felt like the sunset was tailored just for me. The Almighty knows my favorite colors :)
I felt like I was in a dream as I stared and gazed deeply into the clouds... felt like I was at a peaceful place I've never been before.
The sunset definitely cheered me up. There's that tiny glimmer of hope again.
I realize that I really should stop holding on to the issues and insecurities in my life. It's so toxic & unhealthy. I don't know even know why I still hold on to it even though I am consciously aware that i'm holding on to it.
I need to let go.
Breathe, and let it all go...
-Anthea ❤
