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booyeah. Sunday, January 3, 2010 SO! It's 4.48 am AND I should so be freaking SLEEPING. Mass is at 9am later. Goodness me I wonder how i would survive later. Truth is I cannot sleep at all, and going to sleep is becoming a chore rather than a luxury. So i decided to just stay up. And make myself breakfast at 6am, and get ready at around 7 am (or should it be the other way round?) Lets just hope i won't suddenly become dead sleepy. haha. So 2010 has arrived! This year will mark that i have lived on this earth for two decades. Yes two freaking decades. Still young bah kan? haha. Well, i just wish 2010 will be good. To be honest with you, i hated 2009. Probably one of the bleh-est years of my life...!! If 2009 was a person I would have sentenced him to jail and be hung to death. ok over-dramatic, sorry. hmmm. well. I have nothing else to say about this new year thing. i know it's all gonna be cliche cause everyone says the same things. Anyway, HEY YOU. FROM MELBOURNE AUSTRALIA. What are you, my sister's stalker? Read your search query, you typed my sister's full name. So what is it that you want from her? Or what is it that you want to know? I swear to you if you do anything i'm gonna hunt you down. lol. Okay i know that's rude sorry. I think i'm pms-ing man. Teda2 bah me. Well feedjit can be quite beneficial. Oh by the way! I've watched quite a number of movies in the month of december. Avatar And obviously Avatar was one of them, HAHA, been so raging about it on facebook. HAHA. Screw you people who think Avatar sucks. You think you're so great to judge how it's just too graphic-ish and cliche? Oh come on as if YOU can come up with something BETTER. I DARE YOU. Avatar was refreshing. What's so cliche about it? And sitting in between two strangers who happen to be annoying was still worth it.  Sherlock Holmes And oh of course, SHERLOCK HOLMES! I loved Sherlock Holmes. Quite funny too! A movie with great substance. intellectual. Well you need some appreciation for science to actually enjoy this movie, and make sure you pay close attention to everything otherwise you won't be able to understand. haha! And i just love how nicely worded the script was.  The Princess and The Frog It was pleasantly entertaining :) and funny! I liked it. Had a really good ending!  Wizards of Waverly Place The Movie I also watched Wizards of Waverly Place The Movie. Now now, I know your jaw is about to drop. But come on. Wizards of Waverly Place is FUNNY! Even though its target audience are mostly kids. HAHA. Well i don't care. And i don't care what YOU bloody think. It doesn't make me childish if i watch this :P But really, WOWP is awesome. funnnyyy baaa! hahaha. and i enjoyed the movie. This too was quite refreshing to me.  Will always be a loyal disney fan. & i am not ashamed to admit that I love Selena Gomez.But i hate Miley Cyrus to the core! URGH. Bring it on And then i also watched Bring it on: to the finish. Was quite entertained. One of the girls was from centre stage. She's so freaking prettttyyy! oh gosh girl crush much. and she has abs. gila oh! If you like movies with lotsa moves and dances, watch it :)  Bandslam So you can sue me for watching this movie: Bandslam. I watched it even before it was out in cinemas. HAHA. Gotta tell the truth, it was SLIGHTLY lame. like really -.-" Vanessa Hudgens is LAME! LOL HAHA! But it's ok lah... it was better than watching a boring action movie... Kinda liked some of the music in there.  So i guess that's it! haha. I did watched a few more movies but i'm too lazy to talk about it... Well, i hope i won't be too sleepy for church later. For now.... VISIT MY TUMBLR! :D (click) Actually had tumblr since october last year but was never active until now. So visit! :D Have a great sunday guys! 0 blow kisses (comment!) SparklingRainbowDust poured out at 4:47 AM MERRY BELATED CHRISTMAS Tuesday, December 29, 2009 Hi everyone! I know I haven't been blogging lately, and I know this blog seems to be somewhat neglected... sorry about that, but at least, i'm updating now right? hehe. Ok so the end of December is drawing nearer, it has been a very, very eventful month i must say. Even in the month of December itself there were A HELL LOT of UPS and DOWNS. And of course, it will be very soon until we can kiss 2009 goodbye and welcome 2010. It has been a tough year indeed. I thank God that I am still alive. I thank God that my loved ones are also still alive :) Might probably do a 2009 recap. JUST, probably. SO! How was your Christmas? Well, my Christmas was alright, nothing too great, but still, it was alright :) Had a Christmas dinner at home. We cooked! I made Spaghetti, wanted to make lasagna BUT, it's too tiring (i hate making bechamel sauce, but that is actually the yummiest part of the lasagna!) So i settled with Spaghetti... At first I didn't have the Christmas spirit AT ALL, like really. I seemed to be indifferent and insensitive towards the Christmas music and the Christmas decorations, and even during Caroling, my Christmas spirit was not on full throttle yet! I even attended a STARBUCKS Christmas party exclusively for Starbucks regulars (which at first i so did not feel like going but just to profess my love for Starbucks, I went anyway) I SO WASN'T FEELING IT. But you know what? as Christmas day drew nearer and nearer, I felt Christmas more in my heart this year, compared to last year... BECAUSE 1. I actually did a freaking Christmas gift hunt for my family members (spent hundreds man gosh), and traversed throughout the city, and went to 3 different shopping malls in one day, UNTIL my feet hurt. 2. I actually wrapped more presents this year, and wrote Christmas cards (which i don't usually do, write Christmas cards i mean) 3. I made the effort to send practically EVERYONE a Christmas text. 4. And received quite a number of Christmas greetings too. 5. I COOKED for our Christmas family dinner, and made my so-called specialty which is, Traditional Spaghetti... And I put in special effort! And extra ingredients :) 6. Our dinner table had a really Christmasy feel. I'll show pictures after this! 7. We laid down all the Christmas gifts under the Christmas tree this year, and had an exchange of gifts. So yeah. PICTURES! [note: the pictures you are about to see are the same pictures i posted on facebook so some of you may have seen it already...]  Mummy cutting the turkey! My sis roasted it. Tasted good, it's just that the flesh was just TOO HARD! Terus sakit this my gigi! hahaha. Would have gotten a better centerpiece. And a much nicer table cloth. And nicer everything, but i guess this would do... My mum was the one who set the table by the way. I just added the candles. haha :) Christmasy napkin :D Close up Love the flame. So long! Pastaaaaaa Sauce! Daddy likes it :) My cousin liked it too! From my seat Daddy's birthday cake! HEHE. Oh his birthday is on the 24th by the way. Mummy... and daddy's birthday card from mummy hehe I love the blurred christmas lightsss!!!! ARRGHH!! *shouts like a barbaric cave man* Christmas tree! Looks glowy right. Christmas gifts! So colorful i CAN'T STAND IT! I love red and gold :)So yeah i think that's enough pictures for now. HAHA. Oh in case you're wondering what camera i used it's a Nikon D60 (i'm not bragging, and it's not mine) Would want to post more pictures but i'm kinda lazy... haha.. I think that's it for now, getting kinda tired it's 2.30 am already. Night! 0 blow kisses (comment!) SparklingRainbowDust poured out at 11:07 PM A shortie Sunday, December 20, 2009 HELLO! 1. I haven't been updating much BECAUSE, I have been going out a lot and when i come home i'm always so so tired :( 2. I'm currently PMS-ing (& obviously at this period of time i get heated up easily, even for the stupidest and most irrational reasons. For example,getting annoyed by the Christmas songs being played at Kenny Rogers Restaurant. yes, I KNOW, i am weird ) 3. Gonna be part of the Carols by Candlelight tonight :D 4. Currently reading "The Lovely Bones" by Alice Sebold. 5. In the past few days, it's as if everything I eat seems to be quite unsatisfying. It's like, after one bite, i get so full. I even feel like throwing up. AND I DON'T KNOW WHY. And i'm not pregnant ok. hahahaha :p 6. Oh and also, I have been thinking about spending less time on the computer. Not only the internet, but the freaking computer itself, BECAUSE, I would like to make more time for creative endeavors, like composing more songs, figuring out a cheap and affordable way to give my room a makeover, engaging in art and craft work, maybe even make some videos and of course, I want to read more books. The thing about computers, once you turn it on, you're zapped in. And you spend long hours in it, and getting out after being zapped, is incredibly difficult. SO yeah. 7. I will be ending this now because i don't really know what else to say, and once i know what to say this will turn into a shitass long post so.... i better stop. GOODBYE :) 0 blow kisses (comment!) SparklingRainbowDust poured out at 3:16 PM HEHE. Monday, December 14, 2009 YEAH! I wanna bake cookies on your stomach hahahahahahahahaha This is HILARIOUS! Cracked me up. Made my night. ILOVETaylorLautner. And i don't bloody care what you think. hmmph. Watch! :D 0 blow kisses (comment!) SparklingRainbowDust poured out at 2:07 AM Recovery Saturday, December 12, 2009 WELL, I'm glad to say that i am doing and feeling so much better now, and i have pretty much recovered from the shock :) Even though i was feeling so disheartened and practically crestfallen a few days ago, i'm guessing that God is being very considerate about my state, and has made me feel better through his own Godly ways..... Because i am reminded that i have such a beautiful blessing in my life: My amazing church friends. Particularly, those who are, (current lifeteeners and core + sub-core team members) and who were, (ex-lifeteeners) from LIFETEEN SACRED HEART YOUTH MINISTRY! WOOHOO~  But of course, friends from Lifeline is just as awesome :) Started caroling on Thursday night, joined Nelly's group! Caroling made me feel so much better, since i was devastated about my results.... Was so good to catch up with those whom i haven't met in a long long time! And i hate to say this, but i was so shy to set foot at the hall entrance and appear in front of everyone, since i haven't met everyone in such a freaking long time! HAHA. I tried to make my appearance as QUIET and as non-conspicuous as possible (I would have used an invisible blanket if it ever existed) but, i think, i'm probably hard to miss? (bah macamana juga, gumuk sudah wakaka) Had good friends coming over from where they were being busy at as soon as they saw me from afar, and gave me HUGS. I love hugs :) whee~ And because my awesome partner-in-crime for the caroling season, Ms. Lornetha Llyod Daim is in Nelly's group too, I had an effing good time making jokes with her. and laughing our asses off. HAHA! Friday night was probably the best, cause there were more lifeteeners/ex-lifeteeners! . everyone who saw me for the first time after so long went something like"Aik! Antheeaaa??? you're back!" Then it's all proceeded with hugs and the usual questions like.... " When did you come back?? When are you going back to Sarawak?? You came back, and you didn't tell us??? " and it goes on..and on... haha! (AND OH YEAH, I bumped into SIAUNEE who also went for caroling!) KEKE.... I MISS LIFETEEN SO FREAKING MUCH! This is why, I love lifeteen and its people so, so much. It is the best family i've ever had, and in fact, it is the best family i ever have, since they still accept me even though i'm an ex-lifeteener! hehe. Everyone cares for each other. We are, like true brothers and sisters. And i tell you.... LIFETEEN, And mind you, i was a loyal lifeteener. Never missed a lifenite. Never left lifeteen until i had to cause of the age limit. And i've built so many friendships. I've cherished so many beautiful and sweet memories. Lifenites, camps, Planetshakers conference, island and beach trips, caroling, charity events, spiritual events etc... all in the span of about 4-5 years. My whole teenhood.
So it was nice to meet them again! and experience all the love and care, especially during a very rocky emotional state! haha :D It's the best therapy! Bukan sya minta puji. I'm just appreciating my blessings :) Oh in case what you're wondering what lifeteen is, click here. HEHE.  Lifeteen Camp 2007 if i'm not mistaken. Wasn't my favourite camp, but was still quite memorable nonetheless. :) This was when i was still 17! This was taken during the final lifenite i attended before i left for college :) Too bad not everyone was in!! :( And they stretched their hands to pray for me :) partayyy!!yes, i know, i look very different then compared to now. HAHAHA. eeee, i malu! I never got a picture with the core team alone.. but it's ok lah! hahaha :D And there are actually tonnes and countless pictures taken over the years, but i don't have much :( too bad. but it's ok. the memories will still remain :D :) By the way, I told my dad about my results already. He didn't get angry at me, neither did he give any scoldings. He just advised. Yes i like that. Treating your 19-year-old kid like an adult, is the way to go :) HAHA! And it literally broke my heart when when i had to tell him that it is not true when he said "I'm sure you have your way around in excelling, failure does not exist in your dictionary". I am so disappointed in myself for disappointing my dad (even though he said he is not disappointed, but i know he is.... at least a little bit, right? Come on. How can you not be disappointed with failure?? Sot lah you if you happy juga kalau fail) I'm so sorry daddy... But he took it well. Very, very well. SOOOOO.... I'm still in the process of accepting the fact that i have to freaking repeat that bloody marketing 100. Haven't fully accepted that yet. BUT, soon enough, i will. ANYWAY.... Ending this post now cause i think it's getting too long. LOOKING FORWARD TO A WHOLE WEEK OF CAROLING AHEAD :) 0 blow kisses (comment!) SparklingRainbowDust poured out at 9:31 PM *takes a deeeeep breath* Thursday, December 10, 2009 I purposely wanted to wait for a while until i wrote about my results, just so i could gain composure in that certain span of time, and write when i am in an improved state of mind. Truth is, i haven't fully recovered from the shock, and i am not really in a better state of mind, but i've improved slightly nonetheless. So let me begin. I am not the type of person who is accustomed to failure. Well, I'm not trying to say that I always, always succeed, it's just that the probability of succeeding is always higher than failing. The only thing that i've always failed at were things that were not too life-threatening, like failing mock exams during secondary school, for subjects like additional mathematics, biology and chemistry. And then came the supposedly life-threatening SPM. i didn't fail any of those subjects that i used to constantly fail at. And i didn't fail anything for PMR, my foundation year and both my practical exams for the electric organ and theory exams in music. and even a simple computerized driving test which i was so paranoid about i thought i was gonna fail? pass. So the time has come for me to taste, what failure reeaally feels like. And i'm telling you, it is a literally sickening feeling that EATS YOU UP. It leaves no room at all for any sort of feel-good or nice feeling, not even a slight tinge of it, not even a scintilla. It is just, raw. and damn overwhelming.
Some of you are probably annoyed that i make such a big fuss about it. Cause the state of my emotions from the impact of what recently occurred is practically all over facebook, and has managed to pique curiosity in quite a number of people, since i didn't directly state the reason why.... But i make a big fuss about it, cause i care. I CARE, about my dad and his finances, I CARE a lot about not disappointing him, even though he was the one who forced me to engage in academic pursuits that is related to the commerce stream. And don't go on telling me "Who asked you not to study hard? Who asked you to be a lazy ass? " Now let me just tell you this. For MARKETING 100, I attended EVERY lecture that was ever held in the Harry Perkins Lecture Theater with Ms. Shamsul Kamariah, I attended EVERY tutorial session that was ever held in LTCL 8 at the School of Business building with Mr. Adriel Sim, without a single miss, without a single absence. You don't believe me? Go and check the records. and i completed every assignment and task, and I PASSED all of it, and I PASSED my INTERNAL MARKS. And i STUDIED (thought not that hard) for the final exam. But yet. I failed. Oh so tragically. In the final exam. Three possibilities: 1. Marker was just too darn strict. 2. Miscalculation of marks. 3. I just, really did that bad. Now this leads me to wonder. I was a very bad student for Economics 100. I skipped a lot of tutorials. More than thrice if i'm not mistaken. I never pay attention during lectures. I've skipped lecture once. I practically gave up studying for the final exam paper. Internal marks did not even reach 30. And basically, knowledge in economics was very low in my head. In fact, i was expecting to fail Economics. In fact again, i SHOULD have failed Economics. I even brought the textbook back just in case i had to revise it. But you know what? I freaking PASSED. And i even almost got a credit for it. The epitome and quintessence of IRONY. So right now, i'm still trying to accept the fact, that I will have to repeat Marketing 100 for another bloody semester. I've accepted the failing part. i CAN accept the failing part. But what i find very hard to accept right now, is the fact that i have to repeat it again. This is my very first experience with real failure, the kind that involves an effect on time and money, so people, you gotta understand, how i am soooooo making a huge deal out of this! cause it so is! The first time is always the hardest. The emotion from experiencing ANYTHING at all for the very first time, is always the most tangible in the heart. It's the same like listening to a good song for the first time. There's magic when you listen to it for the first time. You instantly fall in love with it. But as time goes by, and you overplay it, it tends to lose its magic. It's the same as experiencing your first heartbreak. There's excruciating pain when your heart is broken by someone you love for the very first time, but as you get into more relationships, and experience more break-ups, you get somewhat, a little bit immune to the pain, though not completely, but it will nevertheless be less hurtful than your very first experience of a painful heartbreak. My dad still doesn't know yet though. I'm trying to think of ways to breaking it to him, without making him mad. And i'm also trying to prepare myself, and have fully grasped the understanding that i may have no other choice but to repeat it. He is going to be so disappointed =( But i hope he will take it easy. And i have to burn another RM 2K just... to... freaking... REPEAT IT! And Idon't even get a chance to do a supplementary exam. I'm so sad... Wanna know how my feelings evolved ever since knowing my results? UTTER SHOCK --> UTTER SHOCK + FEAR --> UTTER SHOCK + SADNESS SADNESS -->--> SADNESS + DEPRESSION --> DEPRESSION --> ANGER. Yes i'm angry. Cause it's not that i didn't put any effort at all into the subject. I feel like it's not fair. But whatever. BECAUSE... When bad things happen, one can never blame anyone else for such misfortune inflicted upon them. So i guess, i am responsible for my own failure, such as this one. BUT I STILL FEEL ANGRY! hahaha. Anyway, it is not the end of the world. Thank you to all who have advised me, thank you to all who have asked me if i was okay, thank you to all who have asked me to be strong, thank you everyone, for your TLC and support :) 0 blow kisses (comment!) SparklingRainbowDust poured out at 12:24 PM Newlyweds: Beatsy and Andy (overdue) Sunday, December 6, 2009 Pictures i'd like to share from my niece's recent wedding :) ~ FYI, my niece is older than i am. SO, don't be surprised. ~ The wedding reception took place at Shangri-La Tanjung Aru Beach Resort (One of the most beautiful resorts, i must say :p) ~ It was a small wedding. I think there were less than 100 guests. HEHE. Ok lah tu. Nda juga bikin pening. I think no wedding has beaten the size of my sister's hotel wedding reception so far (excluding weddings that are held in halls like KDCA). My sister's wedding reception had approximately 800 guests. ~ A non-religious solemnization was held before the reception started, somewhere out there in the garden. LOL HAHA. The church solemnization however, was held after the reception. ~ The food was pretty good :) ~ I have my personal thoughts and opinions on the preparation of the wedding (since it was pretty much chaotic, and were full of glitches). Some of my thoughts are nice, some are really nasty, so i guess, i'll just keep 'em all to myself. hahahahahaha.  Make-up session :) Oh by the way. The make-up artist was a PONDAN! HAHAHA. Okay i'm not trying to make anyone "terasa" here, but i just had to say it =p  Beatsy the bride, and my mum View from the hotel room. nice right? hehe. Where the solemnization took place.  Glasses. I accidentally knocked some of them down. THANK GOD nothing broke! HAHA :) Fragile. Andy's dad, me and my sister. HAHA. My sister perassan, kunun-kunun buat speech sana. HAHA. She somehow reminds me of Marie Digby in this picture. And the camwhoring starts :)My sister and I.  Take 2  DADDY <3>  MUMMY <3 From left to right (uiseh, skema juga ni haha): Ms. Fellyndra Elsa Peter aka Mrs. Tony Chee, Ms. Anthea Fuilyn/Claire Peter and Ms. Janimah@Jane Binti Saliun aka Mrs Peter Wong. BWAHAHA. Hey, i should put myself as Mrs Matthew Lanter or Mrs Taylor Lautner right? HAHAHA kidding!! =p (Taylor is 2 years younger for freaking petesake!)  Daphne and I! hehe. She was helping her dad out with the video recording :) Take 3 "You may now kiss the bride"  After the solemnization ended. So pretty! On the way to the reception room. Very nice ambience. Nice place right? :)  This thing is awesome-looking man. Blurred backdrop. Focused cake. Focused backdrop. Blurred cake. Cake-cutting ceremony i guess? So freaking chubby man. ish. hahaha. MY SON!hahaha. as if. He's one of my newest nephews. Isn't he a cutie? I love him. HEHE. yeah, this is the same picture i set as my facebook profile picture.  I look weird. And if only the baby was looking! :( Mr and Mrs Chee. With their new son. HAHA as if. But it does look like their son right? HAHAHA.  In case you're wondering what this is, this is actually a fish head. HAHA. I know it seems to be some sort of unrecognizable object. I don't normally eat fish heads mind you. But i was just in the mood to.. ya know. try to eat something i don't usually eat? haha!Me: Sis, do you wanna take the fish head and explore it together? So my sister and I did explore it. But somewhere along the line she left me alone and i had to explore it on my own :( LOL HAHA. duiii. And then she took a picture of me trying to devour it. IH. so mean! HAHA. kidding =p  (gosh, so unglamorous! haha!)Anthea and the fish head, presenting you Groovy Green contact lenses by Freshkon. HAHA. Can't really see my lenses right? Nevermind lah...  At the end of the night...0 blow kisses (comment!) SparklingRainbowDust poured out at 11:30 PM |
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